Let’s begin from the beginning

“Where does the river go?”, you said. You looked at me and I had to try to find something for you, some kind of truth, carve it out from somewhere. Because you could always tell if there was no truth to it. 

You said “rays of light sparkle on the moving water in circles. But where does the river go?”

I tried to stay with you, to focus on your voice and why you so desperately need to know this.

	“They said that if you’re not looking, they said if you keep on trying…” You stopped speaking and looked away from me and I could feel your attention slipping and I needed to get you back and pull you towards the light. So I said,

	“A river that flows, crashing through a landscape, it can carve such a huge channel through solidity, you wouldn’t believe! And it always, always moves, it’s never the same river twice.” 





I think about magic all the time but what actually is it something different something not really there but you see it when you’re not looking if you keep on trying then you’ll never get anywhere just stop anyway and look look look look see and stop and sea and rivers and lakes and rain and rain and rains and rains rains rains drops dripping thinking lovely here we are again again again again again and up on the roofs we can see the sun finally rising and feel the warmness on my arms and smell something I hadn’t smelt before and 
		and 
				and 
					and